Saturday, December 31, 2011

Venice

Oh Venice, fabulous in so many ways and decrepit in so many others.  There is no other place like it on Earth.  It was literally the center of European trading for centuries - a whole city built on wooden stakes driven into the bed of the lagoon - all to facilitate commerce (boats are much more efficient at carrying cargo than are carts).  Its millionaires - probably the equivalent of billionaires at the time - built huge palaces to show off their success to passerbys.  The richest, like the Medicis, advertised their fortunes by commissioning artwork by the finest Italian artists.  Their conspicuous consumption gave birth to what we now call the Italian Renaissance.

Whether you are a history dork like me, or just looking for a place that is breathtaking in its uniqueness and quirkiness, you must visit Venice.  Of course, Venice is no secret and the place is completely crushed in the summer, especially from the hours of 9 to 5, when the cruise ship crowd attacks the city.  I was here once in December, and even though the weather can suck, it's a way better time to visit.  It's nearly empty, hotels are much cheaper, and you can really let your imagine run on what it must have looked like during its prime.

Today, Venice's population has dwindled, while the number of tourists has soared.  Unless you really work to get off the beaten path, you'll get the quasi-theme park version of Venice, and you'll constantly be on guard from pickpockets and all sorts of legitimate businesses that are actually out to take your money.  It is hot, there's nowhere to sit, the lines are long and the food is overpriced, but it's still worth it.  Take your time - especially if you stay an evening - and you'll have a much better experience.  Some people have even called the evening scene "romantic" - which is hard to believe at noon when you are pushing through a crowd of Chinese tourists, looking for a bathroom.

Sadly, the city is literally falling apart.  The facades are crumbling, the foundations are sinking into the lagoon even as the sea level is rising.  The most famous monuments, like St. Peters, are in good shape, but a ride down the grand canal - Venice's 5th avenue - has dozens of buildings that are begging for some serious restoration work.

The good news is that Venice's problems are fixable - all it would take is some organization and a lot of cash.  The bad news is that both are in short supply in this corner of Italy, and so the city depreciates year by year.  Hopefully it can save itself from itself before it literally sinks into the sea.

For me, Venice also begged the question of where the next great city would be, and what would the great cities of today - New York, London, and Hong Kong - look like in a different world?  Would New York one day be a city of empty skyscrapers, with tourists from China and India making the trip to see what the world's financial capital looked like hundreds of years in the past?  Dubai, sure it will, when all of its oil runs out one day and its people try to live out their days on the enormous savings they have accumulated.  On my tour of the world, this was one of many monuments to the temporary nature of wealth - Venice is one of many ghost cities, whose glory days are far behind them.  Cuzco, Peru used to be one of the most gilded cities in the history of the world.  Potosi was the 17th century version of Dubai.  Patagonia was home to billionaires who made their fortunes in the sheep and cattle trade.  The people of Buenos Aires used to be richer than their counterparts in Europe.

Venice's decay is probably overstated - the place has been around for nearly a thousand years and probably will be around much longer than we expect.  It certainly is one of the wonders of the world - a place to visit, experience, and ponder.














































Tuesday, December 27, 2011

Swiss Highlands

Warning: this post has a lot - too many - mountain shots.  But hey, welcome to Switzerland where everything is perfect and awesome.

So, Switzerland in 7 bullet points:

1. Huge mountains
2. Rail service to the top.  No walking required.
3. Gourmet food, wine and gelato at the summit.  Forget all that crunchy REI "leave no trace" garbage - you want a glass of pinot noir and some foie gras as you gaze over the roof of the world.  I'd like to see the wine list, bitte.
4. Blazingly fast customer service.    
5. Paragliders.  
6. James Bond.
7. Cows with actual cowbells.

So where to start?  Switzerland is rugged mountains meet French culture, German engineering, and American customer service.  How is this possible?  How can something not have any flaws?  Ok, fine, ignore the price for a bit and just think about how you can have a nation composed only of positive national stereotypes from other nations.  

Ok, so you think - "Hey, I love mountains, but my girlfriend insists on wearing her Tory Burch ballet flats when I go hiking.  Can I still come to Switzerland?"  Yes.  Yes you can.  You can also ditch the Nalgene and bring a couple copies of Wine Spectator, which will be more useful anyway.  You will also want to be impeccably dressed yourself, because shlepping it up to the top in sweatpants and some grungy t-shirt isn't going to fly.  How about a brand new North Face jacket, and some Lulu for the missus?

Or, just wear those Ferragamo loafers you saved for the clubs in Berlin.  Because, to start, there's no need to even walk to the top.  There's a cogwheel train that runs every 30 minutes.  It will set you back $80, which is like the cost of a Happy Meal anyway, so don't sweat it.  The thing was built in like 1920, of course, because the Swiss did the impossible when the country barely had electricity.  

Now that you made it to the top, reward yourself.  Buy some perfume.  Have a glass of wine.  Try those French cheeses you can't remember and definitely can't pronounce but you saw once at Whole Foods.  You've earned it and there's literally no where else in the world this sort of luxury exists, literally, on the edge of a cliff. 

Then take a short stroll around one of many signed, guard-railed and paved paths along the top.  No need to do vertical - that's for the hikers, just a little to and fro to soak up the view will do.

To round it out, watch other people do sweet stuff, like paraglide.  The really adventurous people of the world love to swing by here, where they can crush a red bull and eat some gelato before gliding off the side of a mountain and into the wild blue yonder.  Their gift to you?  The coolness rubs off , and is sort of inspiring, especially when you're a bottle of pinot deep and soaking up the atmosphere at 8,000 feet.  How sick are those dudes?  

Funny Flirting Ecard: I'm outdoorsy in that I like getting drunk on patios.
So are the Swiss.  Go there.




That little red train does the hike so you don't have to.



Then there are these guys - wow.

Enjoy the civilized walk around the top - even heels are OK!

So close you can almost imagine yourself being him, or at least smelling like him (remember that Old Spice ad?)













A picture perfect valley.  The Swiss probably rounded the edges of the mountains just so that tourists could take better pictures.






The "Oberland" - the best of the best mountains in Switzerland.




There are still glaciers!  But there won't be in a little while.  They are rapidly, rapidly receding.

Signed hiking routes with directions and expected travel times!  So considerate.

Cows a mile underneath our cable car.


Jungfrau (I think...)




A loooong cable car ride down.





Harsh and epic looking mountains shrouded in mist.






They really do have those bells, and they just jingle all day in the pastures.


Very thoughtful use of local topography for slidemaking.