The Long Way Down, Up and Around: The Vatican

What would you spend money on if you were the single most powerful entity in the Western world for, oh, at least a thousand years? Would you staff armies and expand your empire? Fund religious studies through monks? Or create what is undoubtedly the world's finest art collection? Well, the folks at the Vatican tried number one and number two for a while, but after visiting the Vatican, it's clear their passion resided in the third. The stuff on display is breathtaking, and by all accounts, its only a tiny sliver of what they have locked up in their warehouses.

The cathedrals of Florence, Venice and Sienna (and forgot about France - JV) aren't much more than a French-sized appetizer compared to the riches on display at the nerve center of global Catholicism. St. Peter's basilica has a floor plan the size of three and a half football fields. It is four hundred feet tall. Imagine an indoor pro football stadium built of marble, covered in gold, and decorated with artwork by the most famous artists in the world. And that's just the church! Vatican city goes on and on.

To be fair, among the "center of religion" city states the Vatican isn't that bad. I mean, look at their company. The Inca's sacrificed people, children actually, to guarantee better weather. The Egyptians burned through thousands of slaves to build giant tombs to themselves. Chinese rulers aren't a lot better - there's the guy who wanted an army of terracotta warriors so he could be a general in the afterlife, and then he ordered all the artists buried with the terracotta warriors so no one else could replicate his army. Then you've got the head of the Ottoman empire with his sprawling palace, hundreds of concubines, all guarded by eunuchs so that he knew his children were really his children. I mean, go to Macau and take a look at some of the stuff China's richest person has collected. We're a little more sensitive to these kinds of things today, sure, but the Vatican was just one power competing for influence with its neighbors to the North, and to the East.

At the same time, you can see how Martin Luther and some of the taxpayers of the day were a little fed up with "government spending" and thought maybe they could get a direct line to God without the fees and surcharges funding acquisitions of Renaissance artwork. It puts Palin's "bridge to nowhere" in perspective.

(Oddly?) the Vatican is also happy to facilitate your own conspicuous consumption in its gift store. Do you need a Ferragamo tie for your next Catechism, or maybe an Hermes scarf? They've got it all, and because of its tax status its duty free!

Literally every square foot of your Vatican tour will be the most over-the-top foot of artwork you've ever seen. The biggest, best maproom, where the most powerful people in the Western world would debate the politics in their empire. The best sculpture collections - not just of Christian art, but also of art from the Greeks, the Romans, and the Egyptians. The Sistine Chapel is mind-blowing. The list goes on and on.

People's reactions? They vary. Some people of the faith come and are turned off by the arrogant service and ostentatious wealth. Others come and find a new pride in their Catholic heritage and the institutions that have supported the faith for thousands of years. Either way, it's a place worth visiting, no matter what you believe, just to see the seat and heritage of one of the world's major religions.